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Growing up in Tegucigalpa, Honduras, I was
encouraged to pursue my curiosities and passions.

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However, as as a queer boy, I learned that
my fluid forms of expression

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were at odds with the strict set of expectations
of Honduran masculinity.

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I feared social alienation and constructed
my masculinity after my father and my brother.

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I internalised, repeated, and performed a
number of inflections, mannerisms, and interests

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to safely navigate the world.

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Nonetheless, I became progressively less confident
in this masculinity because it was artificially

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constructed.

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When I was fifteen, my parents decided to
move from Tegucigalpa to the bustling metropolis

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of Los Angeles.

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Because my siblings were living in the U.S.,

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this move would bring our family together
and offer economic opportunities.

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To me, moving meant leaving behind the comfort
of the communities that nurtured me.

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The move represented the possibility of forgetting
the tropical landscape and streets that watched

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me grow.

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In Los Angeles, I refashioned my identity
to reflect the individual I had suppressed

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for years.

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Developing strong friendships with visibly
queer people at school

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helped me let go of the burden of performing
a homogeneous masculinity.

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I no longer felt the need to conceal my sexuality
and personality from the public eye.

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Nonetheless, I struggled to articulate my
non-conforming identity to my parents.

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I often wore the mask of a burdensome masculinity
around them.

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I felt the need to introduce my new self progressively
to them,

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in an attempt to deconstruct the concept of
a single, defined man.

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I started experimenting in fashion, aesthetics,

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grooming, and physical expressions within
my home.

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In college, the physical distance between
me and my family gave me a feeling of complete

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freedom.

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I took full ownership of my sexuality and
newly conceived masculine identity,

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allowing them to permeate and inspire my artistic
vernacular in dance.

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Through dance, I could communicate pluralities
in gender expression

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and reclaim the movement I once denied for
myself.

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After years of performing for the sake of
others, I finally found the freedom to perform

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for myself

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and project myself out into the world.

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I was anxious about my return to Honduras,
where queerness is culturally stigmatised.

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But, once there, I was able to laugh with
friends and express myself.

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To my surprise, someone in the conversation
quietly asked me "Are you gay?"

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and I responded confidently, "Yes."

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He was caught off guard by my honesty and
conviction,

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and I was equally surprised when he said "You
know, I am, too."

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I was the first person to whom he disclosed
his identity.

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I represented for him what my first queer
friends in Los Angeles represented for me:

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an unapologetic example of visibility.

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My process of becoming comfortable with my
queer identity as a Latino has been defined

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by performing.

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I learned that taking off the mask leads to
an introspective review of my identity.

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Being visibly comfortable in my identity validates
my sense of belonging in the world

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and helps others feel secure with their non-conforming
identities, too.